Keeping our streets clean of ironic trends.

We all know the hipster has an unseasonably cold neck area, which is why they choose to don scarves and kerchiefs year round. We don’t ask why they pair a scarf with a sleeveless shirt? And why their arms seem to be fine with the 72 degree summer day, yet their neck requires a coating of wool? No we don’t ask those questions. All we can do is try to head them off before their next ridiculous idea arises at the hipster conference in Williamsburg. Brooklyn, not the colonial town. But it does paint a funny mental picture.

Prediction: African Neck Rings.

Secondary Prediction: A live Koala (Pray for us all)

Friends of the blog, Urban Outfitters has single handedly crushed a massive hipster mainstay -The Fixie. By selling the once rare hipster creation on their site, UB has pulled the cement out from under the Urban hipster and given every Tom, Dick and Jane access the ultimate mode of ironic conveyence . So how will the hipster get from the coffee shop to the other coffee shop to smoke cigarettes?

Prediction: Man-Powered Rickshaw.

Secondary Prediction: Unicycle, or a large dog. Maybe even an Alpaca. We wouldn’t put it past them.

The messenger bag, a hipster staple seems to have slipped too far into the mainstream to remain ironically hip. What’s next for the hipster? Where will they put their rare vinyl records, loose tobacco and back-up scarves?

Prediction: Briefcase

Secondary Prediction: Baby Bjorn